Friday, March 21, 2008

Seven months ago, came a stroke of good luck;
in the form of a best friend; a real, real best friend.


A guy who laughed along with me about my biggest embarrassments;
A guy who caught onto every word & remembered to remember when I questioned him.


A best friend.
A best friend who knew how I breathed, where I walked, when I laughed, why I cried;
A best friend who knew what warmed me, what broke me.


A best friend who was there- all the time.
A best friend who was just a sleepy phone call away- at 3:45 AM.


A best friend who lifted me from my deepest emotional lows.

In him, I refound part of myself I thought I’d lost forever.
In him, I learnt so much that I never knew existed.
Most importantly, in him, I rediscovered my humour; I refound my laughter.




Seven months ago, I struck great luck;
In the form of a best friend.
A best friend so special that I even forgot to miss having a boy friend.:)




Today, he is in love.
Head over heels in love, & almost sinfully happy about it.


I couldn’t possibly have been more intent & involved in helping him find this happiness.
I couldn’t possibly be more delighted for him.




But suddenly, my world has turned upside down.
Suddenly, I find myself wading through weekends without him.
Suddenly, I find myself being forced to smile understandingly, when he promises to call back.


I find myself listening to his love thank me for having ‘taken care of him‘.
I find myself numb with shock, for some reason.

I find myself feeling pride & delight & a twinge of agony when I hear him declare that his love has replaced me as the best thing that ever happened to him.



On one hand, I’m coping up, only quite well, & nearly wholly happily, to being ‘second-most’ .
On the other, I’m finding it plain impossible to digest the fact that someone else loves him more than I do or claims to; that someone else knows him better than I do or claims to.




Suddenly, I find myself, quite senselessly, blaming even MY being busy on that someone else.
Suddenly, I find myself blaming our smallest arguments & the slightest distance, on his new-found “love”.
Suddenly, I find myself wondering if I ever were 'first-best'!


Suddenly, I feel LONELY.
Suddenly, I’m completely lost!



I feel juvenile, immature & even inconsiderate.
I also feel human.



I don’t wish to be treated like a princess.
I don’t wish to be first priority.
I just want to be included too.

As much as I want him to be blissfully happy in love; I also want him to bother to laugh at a crow on an electric cable.
I want him to bother to call me ‘also’ in the middle of his class to tell me about his professor wearing his pants at his chest!
I want him to assure me that there is no ‘personal space’!
I want him to promise me that ‘WE’ never will be done.



Seven months ago, I struck blinding brilliant luck;
In the form of a best friend.
This is to remind him of what he already knows.
This is to remind him to remember every word i'm writing now- ALWAYS.



Seven months ago, I struck GOLD;
in the form of a best friend.
A real, real best friend.
I CANNOT see him go.

32 comments:

Setu said...

touching.. it's a feeling easy to associate with for those who've been through it.
seems like the irony of life continues, in all spheres, and for all of us.

anyway, nicely written and expressed.
keep writing!

kekedascully said...

Wow!
I loved the text. I felt a bit of happiness and anguish passed by him. Very good. All of us, in a moment of our life, find a special friend and we want more than anything to it, really, of his life.

a new philosopher is born said...

love asked friendship - why are u on this earth when i am here. friendship replied - to bring smile to faces where u leave tears

S Ramanathan said...

and did u say i talk too much on my blog???? lol! :P

anyways, cheer up. as far as i have seen, it is the insecurity in people which kills relationships. dont remind him. dont interfere. bear it for a few days, he ll get back to being normal with u while having is GF, or u ll get used to it. either way, u ll be happy. and, remember, u r in a better position. romantic relationships are funny, they mite just end out of the blue. friends are stronger, the distance helps. chilax and say 'balls' to everyone!

mysticsunshine said...

I'm the best friend people.
When I first read this, I cried.

I very well remember that we were fighting when she wrote this.

Isn't her writing da best?
*lifts head up*

White ROSES no MORE!! said...

@ setu
thank u:)..i will!

@ kekedascully
i swear to god!! i'm in no way jealous.."insecure" is more like it..
i knew and still KNOW that i'm not gonna be replaced by anyway..i wanted him to know, though.. thats all:)

White ROSES no MORE!! said...

@ ramanathan
lol...u do talk WAY more than i do..:):)
and thanks.. i know..and i AM gonna be there for him..
that was just to remind him how much he meant to me...not to rub it in that he's been ignoring me..

but now that i mentioned it, he HAS been.. :-p


but anyway, like u siad,
WHATEVER!
BALLZ to everyone!;)
muahahaha!

White ROSES no MORE!! said...

@ mysticsunshine a.k.a mohit BITCH ravi!

DO NOT EMBARRASS ME!:X

mysticsunshine said...

fuck off bitch!

White ROSES no MORE!! said...

G-O-D!
do u NOW know why he's ma best friend?:p

C R D said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
mysticsunshine said...

wrong comment.
wrong post.

nice!

C R D said...

lovely poem, shows ur pain!! plz move on, im tellin u by experience

Tshhar Mangal said...

Touching
!!!!!!!!
Reminds me of all friend found and lost

poornima said...

@CRD and tshhar
omg! we're not completely 'done' yet!
thanks so much for wantin me to move on:):)..but i don have to..
he's gonna be there always:)

*touchwood*

Dragon said...

hmmm..nice work der..i adore it..

keep posting..

scorpion said...

now tats something after a long long tyme which actually touched me..

and when somethin touches a person lyke me.. then poorie take pride.. ;-)
i thouroghly loved every bit of it.. EVERY.

though nevva passed through da phase which u described.. m in love too.. maybe one of ma friends would feel da same as u do..

bt le me say ur friendship rock..
and loser mohit cant change for anythin.. i know it..
keep writing hon.. love ya

scorpion said...

and dis is for mohit---

u better not change..
giv dis bitch da space she needs..

she is a sweetheart..

abymittal said...

well ma'm what to say.u have displayed ur heart out here. really touching. bt i donno hw wud u rate this,but i m finding myself in a similar kind of a situation.... wen i was emotionally very low[i liked a girl very much bt she turned down my proposal] and my this fren supported me like nything..nw m too dependent on her and same is the case with her...sometimes it seems that she has cropped up feelings for me ..nw i dont wanna hurt her as i dont want to get into ny relation in future coz it hurted me like nything in the past...i have always treated her as a very special fren..perhaps the most special like in my life...donno what to do????

www.abhaymittal.blogspot.com

Arjun said...

Hey , wat a piece of work....
I could co-relate it with me....
So,very well put into words...
I was quite lost reading it , reminded of ' I struck GOLD;
in the form of a best friend.' in my case....
Keep writing...

Cheers..!!
Arjun

Ash D said...

hmm was amazed with the fluidity of your lines... well whatever happens u will remain best friends, somehow something tells me so.. :)

Comfortably Numb said...

this piece was so nice...And me....a superstar... :p...Not many people associate me with that :))...Anyway U got a nice blog up here

Cheers

unpretentious_diva said...

Life is beautifull.
You will find its beauty cherishing you again!

Be happy!

manorath said...

this is a stage which every one finds himself in some point in life.. i wish ur friendship stays forever n u dont become too jealous!! u ve got a lovely style!!

Sarah Rahman said...

Emotions have been expressed in an excellent way.

Keep it up!

s.H.a.S.h.I said...

hmm.. lovely poem... its almost the same story in many of us' lives... keep blogging..

Priyank said...

gr8 work.... n glad that your frnd knows what he has.... I kno he is not gonna let you go, n its for his own good :P

Salil Kader said...

That was beautifully said Poornima! Why does life throw up such situations?! But then life wouldnt be LIFE without these :) TC

m@hesh said...

nice one ... keep rocking

Prashanth Nagaraj said...

cool one.....
awesome.......

keep it up....

vampires have hearts.... n also fall in love said...

Hey.... I was made to read this blog by this Friend Rakesh.... And, the first thing i told him when i read this was " I can relate to this, Very much"....
It is a fantabulous usage of words combined with excellent flow and the best of all, it is right from the heart.... I liked it....
Great one..... WOW!!!!!!

mogi_Phoenix_LightRider said...

Well everythin i felt i wanted to say's already been! So only this:

"This piece of writin is an Emotional Mirror : so much so that i can find my reflection starin back at me from d other side!"

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